You want to touch these, too?

Ok, let me set the scene by saying: Best Office Depot trip EVER. Intrigued? Read on!

To escape the heat I moseyed on down to University Village to wander into Starbucks. I managed to first wander into a couple of other stores, but made my way into Office Depot. Those of you from Seattle might wonder why I would go to University Village, an OUTDOOR SHOPPING CENTER, to escape the heat. I have no excuse except that I went to the mall yesterday and walked out with too many new shirts.

Anyway, I had been thinking about checking out the new "durable" Post-It tabs to see if they'd work better for my day planner. I use them a tabs on the edge, and the current flags I'm using are a bit torn up. The package was $7 for 66 of them, and I didn't want to pay that price only to find them not sturdy enough.

So, I moseyed up to find someone to help me. When I asked the nice guy (I think his name was Darrin) if they had any open so I could touch one of them, he said "Huh, look at that" while he opened the package. Satisfied that they'd work for my purposes, I wandered back to the display to see if I had the best colors possible. You know, the important decisions. The Office Depot brand had one more color in the package, more total tabs in the package, and cost half as much. So, I wandered up with my choice and wound up at Darrin's register. I asked if he thought these would stand up just as well, at which point he asked "Do you want to touch these, too?"

Honestly, best offer I had today. I've always wanted to have a tall, dark, handsome fellow inquire if I'd like to touch his post-its. I liked them and I bought them.

It’s a symphony of flavor, but I’m not sure which section is off key

The team of Debi & Justin working on a description for Trader Joe's Pumpernickel Pretzel Sticks

I told my friend Scarlett to come to my blog for entertainment, so it's time to get back to entertaining.

After I found the Original Ream-n-Klean at a Walgreen's near me, I went to work. Then, Chris and I went to lunch next door to Trader Joe's. So, after lunch, I stopped in to see what I had to buy, and well? I had to buy these some pumpernickel pretzel sticks. Not only did I share pipe cleaners, I shared pretzels with those near and dear to me at work. I brought one to Justin because boss-man has been known to make his own chocolate-dipped pretzels and bring them to his peons folks.

So, I gave one to Justin, who looked at it suspiciously...they actually look like teeny tiny cigars, which lead to a bastardization of the Freud quote more than once. He tried it, and the look on his face made it obvious he did not approve of the pretzel. He said "It is a symphony of flavor..." then paused and continued with something that wasn't funny and I've thus stricken it from mind. So I added "...but you're not sure which section is off key?" That? That's humor ladies and gents. I'm full of humor, amongst other things.

The Original Ream-n-Klean

Those of you who know me know that I usually have a cup of Starbucks Iced Tea nearby. Recently, they came out with the clear, insulated plastic cup in a 20 oz size. So, I use it.

The only downside to this setup is that tea tends to, um, clump in the straw and it can get a bit nasty after your 20th cup. So, I stopped by Walgreen's yesterday for some light bulbs and decided it was time to get some pipe cleaners. The only brand they had were Bryn Mawr Original Ream-N-Klean. No kidding? It Reams It Cleans It Scrubs AND It absorbs. Even though I have NO need for 90 of these little suckers, I decided that the BEST. PRODUCT. EVER. must be mine. So, I doled them out to people at work.

They feel as disturbing as they sound...it's like barbed wire with a little chenille in it. Very odd. But it did a good job getting the crud out of my straw, so mission accomplished with a smile on my face.

I have many peeves. I don't like to play favorites.

Response to one of those silly Facebook questionnaires that asked me to name my pet peeve

I don't actually think I have that many "peeves". Most of the things that really annoy me are things I should have done but wasn't paying attention to. You know, ignoring the descending gas gauge until I HAVE to fill up my car on the way to work? Not looking at my list and thus not getting some staple like OIL that I should've gotten a week ago? My loving mutts hiding my sunglasses case under the couch because I didn't zip up my purse? Oh, even better. This morning? I left my purse on the roof of the car in front of the house.

There are things that piss me the f*ck off, but those are TYPICALLY not genericifiable (like that? I made that up). It's not really kind to say "So-and-so REALLY pisses me off" on the off-chance so-and-so will run across your blog and make life hell for someone you like.

This comment WAS plagiarized by a friend that did the questionnaire after me. She didn't change several answers, but damn it, this one is GOOD. Imitation...sincere flattery...blah blah blah. Have we met? I want the friggin' credit where it's due, man. ME. ME. ME.

Anyway, I think I just like to bitch and moan in general because it amuses me. Until the point where I start repeating myself (either in general subject or specifics), then Chris hears me say "Damn, I annoy the shit out of myself." Very diplomatically, he does not comment at these times. Just for that, lunch is on him tomorrow.

There's Not Enough Room in this World for my Pain...

"Ghost" by the Indigo Girls
I admit it. I'm waxing a bit melancholic. This song has always referred to only one person for me, even though it's a somewhat universal lament for young love lost. It's also one of those songs you can play on the freeway with your windows rolled up...belting at the top of your lungs.

I've got a few songs that go along with this one. We've all got our "OH THE DRAMA" lists. Some of us have it in a playlist called "Oh the Drama". It's one of those small lists for me so far. It contains:

"Every Rose Has It's Thorn" by Poison
"Song Remembers When" by Trisha Yearwood
"You Must Love Me" by Madonna
"Desperado" by the Eagles (Yeah, I don't like the Linda Ronstadt version)
"Two Outta Three Ain't Bad" by Meat Loaf (Like Meat Loaf would be missing from ANY list?)
"Separate Lives" by Phil Collins
"Same Auld Lang Syne" by Dan Fogelberg
"Hold on to the Nights" by Richard Marx
"What Might Have Been" by Little Texas

There are more, but I seem to be seem to have upwards of 12,000 mp3s, so it takes a while to find stuff AND remember to put it in the appropriate list.

Perhaps tomorrow, I'll pull out something poppy and summery.

Can I buy Europe on pump 4?

Glitch hits Visa users with $23 quadrillion charge

Go. Read this for yourself.

Did you go read it? What are you waiting for. I'll wait here.

Ok, good. I have some thoughts.

• He racked up this total buying cigarettes. The surgeon general says they're bad for your heart...she just didn't think it would induce cardiac arrest with the price tag.
• It's a freakin' pre-paid debit card. How much debt can you get into with a Pre. Paid. Debit. Card.
• They kept him on hold for 2 hours and then graciously said they'd reverse the charge AND the overdraft fee? Mighty compassionate of them. Send them the rehabilitation bill.
• How quickly do you think he smoked that really expensive pack of cigarettes waiting for Visa to screw with him?
• What comes after the American Express Super Secret Uranium-238 Card? Wait, I know the answer to that one. It's The Plum Card. I know when I think about how to market to businesses in this adverse economic climate, my thoughts turn to fruit.

On the other hand, it's one way to pay back all that bail-out money we gave to the banks!

A transparent craving on the part of the authors to appear likable

So the picture? From an icon of a commenter on Politico. When I image Googled "Transparent Craving", it was one of only 3 images that came up. And I like it.

So, in theory, this quote is from Loitering with Intent by Muriel Spark. The problem is that it was in the preface of another book that I didn't notate. I thought it was in An Arsonist's Guide to Writers' Homes in New England, but in the nifty little "Look Inside!" feature on Amazon, I don't see it. So, I can neither confirm nor deny with certainty it's origin.

Tangentially? I was really looking forward to The Arsonist's Guide... I know there are still people out there who refuse to leave a book unfinished. I am not one of them. If it hasn't caught me in the first 100 or so pages, I've got to be really bored to continue. I figure life is too damned short to read/watch/listen to crap. If my answer to "Do I give a rat's ass how this ends?" is anything other than "yes"...next! That book was like that. As the Bastard Neil would put it, a lot of navel gazing. Or maybe it was something about foot gazing, I'm not sure. You get the gist. Debi thought the book sucked ass. However, Loitering with Intent might be good.

The quote spoke to me. I guess I feel like I've always had a transparent craving to be liked...I suppose some folks will look at that and laugh, so perhaps it isn't SO transparent. I do so desperately want to be liked and always have. I suppose I've just come a bit more to terms with the fact that I'm an acquired taste with some HIGHLY annoying habits (even to myself). Doesn't mean I don't spend time in therapy over it, but this is Seattle. If you're not in therapy, you're weird. So next time you see me, make sure you tell me how likable I am. Not you, Mom. You're biased.

I blame Civilization

Mike and I have been on a game binge. For a few years now, we've been addicted to "casual games". Those are comparatively short games that you typically download from a site like Yahoo! Games or Shockwave. You may be insane about it for a few days, but it doesn't keep going. Unlike say, World of Warcraft, which I hear you can play for years.

We're on a GAME binge. It started when I bought The Sims 2. A couple of days later, it seemed only fair to find something for Mike. He'd tried a demo of Neverwinter Nights, so he picked that up. Mike sorta dropped games like that after Dungeon Siege (also known as Dungeon Crack) came between us once too often.

Anyway, I hated the Sims. There's no goal. It's your job to make these whiny little f*cks happy. I don't care about that in real life, why would I want to do it in a game. So, I went and picked up Civilization IV. And, I blame it for not being good about updating this blog.

I'm not used to being slow on the game uptake. I'm good at games like this. I think the issue with Civilization is that you need STRATEGY. Me? I'm a brilliant tactician, but strategy is beyond me. Give me a job to do, and I'm all over it. Make me think about the politics involved or worse yet, THE BIG PICTURE? No. I haven't made it all the way through a game yet. I understand why people get addicted to this game. It's amazingly complex and detailed. The AI is pretty impressive and there are a lot of folks that play online. But I don't think it's going to last much longer for me. Especially if I don't feel like I'm winning. I don't like to lose for the sake of a learning experience. I know you probably find that hard to believe and all.

The other thing I blame is not being at work enough. Honestly? I'm just not as witty when I don't interact with others. Mike and I are busy staring at our computers, and frankly, the dogs don't inspire too many funny comments.

But, I'm working on it. Don't stop reading. Those of you who still do.

The power of positive thinking…also known as denial

John Henson on Wipeout

Mike is irrationally amused by this show. To the point that he convulses through most of it. It's essentially 24 goofy people taking on an impossible obstacle course for $50,000. The Japanese have been doing it for years. There are a lot of good shots of the human body in positions nature never intended in super slo-mo.

Mike wants to go on the course. There's not much chance to go on the show since you (1)have to live in California and (2)must be able to at least FAKE outgoing.

Fascism by proxy

David Sullivan characterizing his homeowner's association

Itty Bitty Crazy should be yippy skippy over the fact that I have ALREADY queued up tomorrow's post. I could still be sitting here trying to figure out Civilization IV which may, in fact, be too complex for me to wanna waste my free time on.

So, David's homeowner's association doesn't seem to like bird feeders. Bird feeders, people. So, when David (who is obviously a subversive) hung one on his deck? They. Took. Action. Like all dictators, they reported it to the management company so that their hands would not be dirtied.

Bird Feeders? Where I come from, homeowner's associations exist to make sure you don't park that 1962 30' camper in your driveway and mow your lawn occasionally. I've HEARD that they care what color you paint your house, but face it, most people that live in a covenant community aren't creative enough to paint outside the lines...at least where I'm from. A friggin' bird feeder, people? Unless it has neon lights and plays Boom Boom in the middle of the night, what's the problem???